Have you ever pondered the guests who come to your house when all is dark and the world is asleep?
Invited Night Guests
Uninvited Party Crasher
Fear is a worse companion than Pain. Pain comes alone, but Fear always has some creepy companions…don’t ask me who they are, I don’t dare look that closely, do you? Pain sits with you and puts blinders on, then slowly tortures you, but Fear…ahh, Fear dances around. It teases you. It plays Hide and Seek, and Peek-a-Boo.
Tonight Fear paid me a visit. It was like when you are watching a movie and the suspenseful music starts and you know something bad is about to happen. The hair rises on the back of your neck, you feel your body tense and your mouth goes dry. If the fear gets too intense, you remind yourself that it is just a movie.
Unfortunately this movie was in my own mind, a memory close to resurfacing, I think. It is awful to feel like a child again when that child experienced trauma and no comfort. It is hard to trust that comfort will come this time.
“Trust,” part of me whispers, “trust someone will be there.”
“Yeah,” another part answers…”like Santa Claus, or The Sandman.”
Trust. . .I reach for it, but it is just outside my grasp. Fear is closer, smothering now.
I hope the dawn comes soon.